Thursday, October 18, 2012


School has been going really well for the girls.  They seem to be enjoying the activities and come home worn out each day.  It's great!  

It was a little different on on Monday.  #1 came home and told us that one of her friends at school said she didn't want to be friends any more. 
Immediately, I wanted to call this little person on the phone and figure out why.  Why does she not want to be friends with #1?  Did something happen?  Was #1 mean to her?  Was she mean to #1?  How can I fix it?  Because I can fix anything, right?  

WAIT A MINUTE... How is she ever going to learn how to work her way out of problems if I fix it?  The last thing I want is to be a helicopter parent.  It won't teach the kids anything and they will always look to us when problems need solving.  They won't know how to do it on their own.  #1 has to figure this one out.  All I can do is guide her in the right direction.  Get her to think about what she wants in a friendship.  What she doesn't want in a friendship.  I told her that friends often have similar interests and when you are around them, it usually makes you happy.  We talked about what it means to be a good friend and discussed things that a good friend should never do.  

These conversations have come way too early in her little life.  While I am sure this little girl wasn't trying to be mean, it still hurts.  It probably hurts me more than it does #1.  But, I'd like to thank that little girl.  Her comment resulted in my fist heart to heart with #1.  It was all I imagined it would be.  We snuggled next to each other on the couch next to the fire.  No tears... this time.  The issues aren't big enough yet, I suppose.   Things could change down the line, too.  They could end up being the best of friends.
As long as the door of communication is open, I can help her fix anything!!!
BUT - she is not allowed to date until she is 30.


  1. Just wait until you get to the first boyfriend breakup. Ugh. I know I survived it all but it's amazing how much they truly believe that "THIS is the one forever!"... at least for a while. Good for you for letting her figure it out somewhat on her own. Kids can be so cruel sometimes. And it really think that sometimes they say mean things just to get a reaction.

    1. Oh, I know! It's only just begun. Until now, it was always fighting with just siblings. It was always an easy thing to figure out. "Go to your room", or "I'm going to separate you two/three". But I can't really do that with the friend from school. Oh well. I'll take it all in stride!

  2. We just had our first big "friend fight" W. got over it but it stings just the same. I hope her heart mends quickly!

    1. It does sting. I think it stings with the parents a little bit longer when they are younger. They are so fragile. I bet once they are teenagers, we're going to be thinking "get over it, kid!" :o)


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